From when the girls first started kindy, then school, I found out what really overtired children were. Children that fall asleep eating dinner.... one time Chloe fell asleep and her head fell in her bowl. Drowning in your own bowl of food is definitely a sign of over tiredness lol.
Times when kids are crying and they don't know why. Times when adults are crying and they don't know why either!
Sometimes it was just that feeling of being utterly run down or coming down with something. Sometimes a crisis of some kind that meant really a quiet day would be a very good idea.
For all these reasons we would declare a pyjama day. And Mum was right, prevention is better than cure.
Mum has kept everyone stocked with soft warm rugs. We always have some on the lounge.
There is an awful ad on TV here about someone very sick sneezing, coughing and spluttering germs and flu bugs wherever they go. The ad says "soldier on..." and shows them on public transport going to work enabled by a certain tablet. Meanwhile they are spreading their bug to everyone around them and getting sicker probably! I hate this ad and the message! No! If at all possible stay home and keep your germs to yourself. Look after yourself and do what you can to get better.
The first time I kept Chloe home from school for a day with sheer over tiredness I felt guilty. The same when I thought she was just coming down with something. But the results were so good and I think many times we averted getting really sick or run down. Over the year it tuned out their school attendance was excellent and they got seriously sick very rarely.
Some of Mums work.
When the girls were little they had pink and multi coloured rugs with sparkles in them.
Mum would put in little knitted pockets for small toys.
I hope I instilled in them that we need to be aware of how we are feeling. Are we overwhelmed, over extended, going down hill... should be stop, re assess, have a rest or get some extra sleep?
We often need an intervention ourselves... it might be the Doctor saying that we need a week off. Sometimes then we listen, sometimes not!
I put on a quick chicken soup. Lots of garlic is the key for germ fighting!
Now I know there are times and circumstances when people cannot take time off. The young Mum with several children might never be able to get a break when she needs it... amongst others. And then there are jobs we fear losing etc. but I am talking about when we do have the choice and can make these decisions.... there should be no guilt in declaring rest is needed.
People often say I get lots done. I think I sometimes do but usually it is more the result of keeping at something in small bites and also bursts of activity when I can. There are days where I just cannot keep going, have a migraine or just feel too tired, too overwhelmed. To me a day off then is my best investment. Put some soup in the slow cooker. Drink lots of tea. Read and write. This is not a waste. It is just the most sensible thing to do.
My husband will get very tired and keep going. He has had tons to do and on Sunday afternoon he said he will keep working on a woodwork project. I said to him I think he should just have the afternoon off. And he did. He played music for the afternoon and I could see it did him good.
It is known that we need times of rest for our immune system. God made no mistake declaring seven days one of which was to be a day of rest. But many people do not get this day.
I learned a long time ago that if I pace my day and treat it as a job where I get tea breaks and a lunch break then overall I get so much more done. You feel tired and take a tea break. Then you are ready to do some more! I think in the picture of a month or a year taking a day off is the same thing, overall maybe you will actually be more productive. And sick less often.
These days of rest were times when the home as a sanctuary from the world was so important. The girls would create a "nest" on the lounge with a blanket and a pillow. A drink nearby and a plate of nibbles. They would be so snug and comfy. The house would smell of something cooking. Nothing could be nicer and more comforting. We need this so much sometimes. Permission to do nothing but be restored.
I think a lot of terrible decisions have been made by people overtired, overwhelmed and worn out. With time to rest, reflect, restore our chances at life are just much better. This is not time wasted, it is vital to re charge the batteries. How often have you re thought something and seen it in a different light after some time to think on it?
Some of my biggest eye opening revelations have come when I have just stepped back and waited for a bit. Then the penny drops... something you never saw before becomes obvious. I credit a quiet day and time out for some of the most important realisations and decisions!
Yesterday I had a day like this! I planned, made lists, had cups of soup and tea. Today I am ready to get going and hope to have a great week!
How is your home a sanctuary for the sick, run down, anxious and sad times? When I was little Mum would set us up on the lounge with a blanket and pillows, drinks and snacks and I loved it!
Have a wonderful week. We have a public holiday mid week with Anzac Day. And lots to do today! xxx
Gosh, did u write that post just for me Annabel? Of course you didn’t, and of course the world does not revolve around me, but it’s 11 am and I’ve just made a cup of tea and climbed into bed. Got up at half six and have cleaned the kitchen and hung out the washing and fed all the animals. I’m tired, overwhelmed and a bit down so I took myself to bed to read. Thought I’ll just see if you have posted and there it was. Great reading and 100% agree with all and yes those soldier on ads are socially rude I think. Now to drink my tea, and read and have a snooze. Fi xxReplyDelete
Dear Fiona, It sounds like you could really use a pyjama day. I hope you can get such a day... do what you can to make one happen. You have had a lot on your plate.Delete
As a nurse you must hate those ads. Just terrible. Go forth and spread around your germs... too bad they might kill someone already sick or an elderly person! We had this at school... kids would go to the front office to get their antibiotics at recess while clearly terribly unwell. :( You rest up and do some nurturing... it is like on the airplane... when the oxygen comes down we are meant to put ours on first so we can then be ok and help others... just like that! With love Annabel.xxx
Dear Annabel, this is all so true, and so familiar! I agree...people being tired isn't always obvious. But mood swings, general crankiness or snappiness, getting sick easily, crying for no reason...all signs that someone is tired or even over-tired. As much as I love being productive, Mondays are usually my nesting, resting day. The weekend is over (always busy for us), there's usually only washing to be done, and the house is mine. Resting and nesting is good. It prepares me for the rest of the week. Mimi xxxReplyDelete
I couldnt remember if it was you or Lorax who named this Mental Health Day.... but I know also called it that. A mental health day is a darn good idea sometimes. Prevention is much better than cure. I am trying to get some servings of various soups in the freezer ahead of time too. Enjoy your lovely nesting day! With love, Annabel.xxx
So true, Annabel. I too dislike that soldier on ad but I know some people fear losing their job if they don't turn up for work. So sad! Your mum is amazing the way she makes such lovely rugs etc. and it looks like she has a very interesting necklace on in the photo from what I can see.ReplyDelete
This is a great post. I have declared a week's 'staycation' for myself in a couple of weeks. The past two weeks and this upcoming week have too much busyness in them, so I am definitely feeling the drain. I will sew and do little, if anything, outside the home during my self imposed stay at home vacation.
Love and hugs,
Dear Glenda, I am glad you are having a staycation! I know you are needing that. It will do you good. Enjoy and I hope it helps very much. with love, Annabel.xxxDelete
Annabel my two were the energiser bunnies of our area. We all knew they weren't well, and needed a battery charge, when they sat down for more than just meal time. As adults they are still the same. With both Bluey and I working, our children reaching State rep level in their chosen sports, and running a farm, quiet days simply did not happen.ReplyDelete
Times change, the children grew up and moved on, we moved interstate into town and now most days are quiet days. This does not mean they are days without purpose. It just means the level of busyness has subsided substantially.
When Bluey was so ill, and I was driving several hours each way to see him in hospital, I thought I was just fine. Then I bought him home and suddenly I had no energy at all. All the adrenilin had been used up and needed to be paid back. At first I was ashamed that I had nothing left in the fuel tank, then I accepted this need.
Now when I feel the need to recharge the batteries, I pack a thermos, a book and grab my camp chair and head down to the beachfront. There is lovely shady areas overlooking the water. An hour or two later and I am ready to get back to it.
Reading a good book in the shade at the beach makes Life feel so good.
Dear Jane, I think we keep going in a crisis like you say from adrenaline and then BAM it all hits us after. Well I am like that. It will wipe me out. Your life now sounds good, you can pace things right for you both. being near the sea also is the healthiest thing ever I think! With love Annabel.xxxDelete
Hi Annabel, I think this is an important topic. I think it is very important that we listen to our bodies and stop, rest and recuperate when we are feeling sub par. That ad does send the wrong message. We have a colleague at work who regularly comes into work sick, and coughs and splutters through each Winter, invariably passing her germs onto others, including last year a pregnant lady who couldn't even take anything for it. I am sure we are all supposed too be awed by her fortitude but in my opinion this is selfish and inconsiderate to those around her.ReplyDelete
On a happier note i love your mums necklace and those pretty soft green rugs she made, what a trooper she is.
Love Lisa xo
In some countries that worker would be handed a face mask. I think not a bad idea... the vulnerable who dont need unnecessary infections are the victims here. I think its terrible.
Thanks for the nice words on my Mum! With love, Annabel.xxx
We over-schedule our days and nights, our children are so busy they don't have time to be children; it's no wonder the world has gone crazy with stress and illness and anger - everyone is so overtired from just living in 2018. We have a "day off" every week - Saturday for us. I don't do housework, Wayne doesn't do gardening or maintenance chores, the kids all relax. We still do dishes and make beds and take rubbish out, but otherwise it's a day off. I cook ahead on Thursday and Friday for our meals so they can either be cold or just need reheating. I tend to read or knit or make cards, to music. Wayne likes to watch his car/4wd/train DVDs. Sometimes we have friends for lunch or dinner. And for the last 12 months or so we've tried to make it a technology free day (no 'puters, tablets, phones unless to make a call). Often I pack the picnic basket and we go for a drive somewhere. God showed his wisdom in giving us a Sabbath to rest and renew, and even He rested on the 7th day and I am happy to take the commandment as the blessing it is to us.ReplyDelete
Dear Cath, This over scheduling thing is awful. I think tis a terrible stess. I also see it often results in very late nights for small children and they are up again early in the morning and off to the next thing.Delete
Good point! God rested on the 7th day! I have over time simplified my routine and appointments etc as being out too much just has all the wrong effects on me. I agree with you entirely! With love Annabel.xxx
Annabel and Cath,Delete
Thank you for this post. I appreciate very much the idea of listening to my body and not overscheduling my day.
A long time ago, right at the first of my parenting, I heard a quote that I have tried to live by. "We are human beings, not human doings. We all need space in our lives, even children." With this quote, I have been able to turn down good things that are too much for our schedules, and stop the sports over involvement for our family. We also have turned down some things we would like to be involved in and some things that would have been fun, but would have stopped our evening meals together as a family. Just recently, my husband again reminded me that the family meal has to be the priority for our family. And he said, "If we don't make it a priority, the world will replace it with something else."
love to all, and I hope that we will all be brave enough to follow what is good for our own familes and not what the culture dictates.
Your whole comment was just wonderful. You are very blessed to have such a wise and godly husband who looks out for your family. We are just getting into this as our John is 9 months old, yet we have lots of people pulling us this way and that, and invitations come that are well-meant but need to be turned down. A lot of times Colton and I will say no if it will keep us out too late or interfere with feeding/naps. We just enjoy being home sharing each other's company but the world seems to think one needs to be going and doing all the time. Thanks for your encouragement.
Dear Cristy, We also believe the family meal is enormously important. Many people NEVER sit down as a family for a meal. I tried to have a one sport or one after school activity per child and that was enough... we could not be out late every night of the week!Delete
Thank you for sharing this with us! Love Annabel.xxx
Thanks Annabel, and Kelsey, for your kind comments.Delete
Kelsey, your family will learn what is the right amount of involvement for your family. Guard it. It's really important.
I agree with you, Annabel. I think we all need to take this to heart. Work places want 24-7 people. It is ruining people's health, even killing some! The sad thing is the 'soldier on message' is to benefit the businesses at the sick person's expense.ReplyDelete
We NEED to read such posts as this so we can stop, reflect, and see how we might make good changes that benefit us, and our families, too. Very wise words. I appreciate what you have written. I will take these wise words to heart. So good!
This is exactly right about employers. My husband had two heart attacks and one was actually at work. Many in his dept were heart attack survivors and now my husband is disabled because of his last one. He often worked 60-90 hours a week and was on call 24/7 because he was the only one who knew the things he knew. Funny how they have been able to go on without him after he nearly died.Delete
Sounds like a pretty perfect day to me. We’re currently on holiday in England and have been going non-stop for two weeks. All the drivingvand sightseeing takes out of you. So the other morning, we could have gone to see the ruins of an old castle, or we could stay in our pj’s until lunchtime. Pjs won out and we stayed in our little AirBnB just resting and watching British tv. It was wonderful :)ReplyDelete
Dear Anorina, Traveling is exhausting! I could never do a tour type holiday as if would be too gruelling for me! I need quiet days to rest and soak it all in. Otherwise it is just not enjoyable. I hope you have the most wonderful time! With love Annabel.xxxDelete
Hi Annabel and a great subject and your Mum is a wise woman :).ReplyDelete
I am also another one that says if you are sick then stay at home as sorry to say I don't want your virus or bacteria sickness near me if possible :). Being an ex nurse I have always stayed at home if I was sick.
Now I previously said we didn't have a day off but indeed upon thinking about it it is every Sunday our Sabbath. We try and cook a double batch of food on a Saturday so Sunday is just reheating our meal. Apart from essentials say washing up if needed nothing usually gets done on this day. Sometimes we do decide to spend time in the kitchen on this day as our family home evening and make treats for the week as well.
We do also just curl up with a blanket and hot chocolate when we are sick and rest. When I had pneumonia (unbeknown to me) last year I soldiered on regardless as we had a real estate inspection due. Let me say I paid the price and passed out on the floor to which my husband picked me up and put me to bed and told me to stay there after he took me to the doctor and found out what was wrong.
If we listen to our bodies and the way we feel then in my view we remain healthy, rested, far less stressed and our energy levels boosted so we are more productive too.
Dear Sewingcreations, I think the same. I remember when the girls were babies having visitors that were sick. I couldnt fathom visiting someone with little kids while you are really ill. It makes no sense to me. I was horrified!Delete
The Sabbath is for a reason and one of them is restoration in all ways I think. We just need it.
I also have had some really bad results from keeping going when I should not... yours was spectacular! Yes we must listen to our bodies! With love Annabel.xxx
Oh you are so right! I love your Mum's rugs with the little pockets, You are a wise Mum yourself. Those TV commercials make me angry, too. Funny how we have the same things here that you do there.ReplyDelete
After my husband had the heart attack and the brain injury he must have a nap every afternoon. So, I nap with him and it has been good and healing. A few months ago we decided to get all the chores done on weekdays and have every Saturday off. We sleep late and do nothing all day. Some weeks we go out to thrift stores or to eat lunch but most weeks we just stay around home and rest. It has been wonderful and we are so thankful for the ability to do so. We always have throws on the couches here even in the summer just because they are comforting.
I want to write about early intervention with regards to using essential oils, homeopathic and health generally.... I might write to you for more help on this.
My Dad after a heart attack and surgery needed the afternoon rest also. Well this kept him going until today which is 21 years later. He is 81 in May. My Nana, Dads, Mum, always had an afternoon nap and never was unwell and so energetic until her mid 90s.
So I can see a lot of sense in this! With love, Annabel.xxx
I will do all I can to help you. We go to the lake house for 2 weeks leaving on May 5 and returning May 18 so soon I will not be as available. This is the best resting place there is with quiet and no internet connection!Delete
I am really seeing the value of rest for the first time in my life and I am thankful that we have learned this at this age and can go into an older age with better sense. :)
Everyone needs a day off sometime. We sometimes take a "Mental Health day". Just lay around and relax. This winter we have several PJ days thanks to being snowed in. We read books, watched movies and played cards and games. It helps us also bond as a family. Easy meals are what are on the menu. Pancakes and soup can get us through the day. Maybe some cookies with hot chocolate.ReplyDelete
Makingcentsofitall, I think snowed in days could be quite nice if you are warm and content inside! Good warming food... lovely!Delete
Another reason for a well stocked pantry! If we have everything we need staying in can be a proper rest!xxx
Hi Annabel and everyone,ReplyDelete
Annabel, your pyjama day is such a good idea. I completely agree with your mum about prevention being so much better (and easier!) than the cure.
For illness, I try to keep my pantry stocked with things like extra boxes of tea, tinned soup (sometimes only a childhood favorite for comfort with do when someone is sick), small pasta, and crackers, and the freezer with homemade chicken broth and fruit juice popsicles. We have a small medicinal pantry in my linen closet that always has throat lozenges, acetaminophen, a thermometer, neti pot, etc. Sometimes I think I keep more blankets than any person needs. At least this way we have everything that we need if someone gets ill, and don't have to run around spreading germs. I also really love to throw lots of ginger, fresh rosemary, and some garlic in homemade chicken broth and really believe that it helps both upset tummies and congestion.
I have to admit I can be the worst about thinking that I *must* power through despite illness; I am working on this, as it is definitely better for everyone if I do not. My husband and I have taken to having one weekend afternoon/evening where we do restful things together; maybe reading our books with a cup of tea, or going for a leisurely stroll or trail ride and looking for interesting birds or plants. Going to bed early and trying to get a good night's sleep has also been really helpful.
For anxiety, soft scented candles, cozy blankets, warm drinks, and a favorite book or soothing music and a craft helps me. I keep some coloring books for adults on hand, too - it can be very restful and having something to do with my hands helps!
Hope everyone has a great day!
Dear Kathy, Thank you for your great tips. Your supply list is really good! I keep spare blankets too. To me back up is a good thing. If the power was out we would need much more bedding than we currently use too.Delete
I am thinking over my pantry supplies... and now and then I need to go through things that have expired too as that seeks up! Many thanks! Love Annabel.xxx
Hello beautiful Annabel, what soothing words for the soul! I loved this post. My goodness, this has summed me up this week. I am so tired, and really need a pj day. I think I have bene running on empty with Henry not 100% and running him to doctors etc I have felt bad for cancelling plans, but I think I need to re-think my routine so I have at least one day of the week where we can simply heat up the meal and only do washing. No other chores and just go slowly all day. I think it is very important and really eliminates stress, unhappiness, and possible sicknesses. Thank you so much for your beautiful words. You touch so many! Thank you! Lots of love, BridgeReplyDelete
Dear Bridge, It is so hard with a sick child. Don't feel bad for cancelling plans that you cant realistically manage. Mum always used "the Doctor said" excuse.... she was never good at saying now so she said thing were doctors orders as she found people argued less then. I did this same thing quite often and it did help! You do need some quiet days and little kids get over tired and nothing goes well with an over tired child! Thank you for your kind words! With love, Annabel.xxxDelete
Oh girl, I totally resonated with this post. Took me back to those pajama days with my own children...and reminded me of all the good it did in prevention and healing. Perfect advice (and chicken soup!) for everyone, not just children. Thank you. xxReplyDelete
Thank you! We try to take care of everyone. Many things are emotionally tiring as well as physically. We must take some time out to re charge. With love Annabel.xxx
I was just telling Colton that I don't know what I would do without our day of rest, which is Sunday for us. I know I would get run down in a hurry.
Colton will be starting shift work very soon, so days of the week won't mean much, but he said any time he gets a Saturday or a Sunday off, they are ours to do what ever we want. So no ranch work (other than necessary daily chores), no to do lists, etc. They will be days for us to do nothing, rest, go somewhere together, or work on a project only if we want. I am really looking forward to it.
As for soldiering on, there is a time for that but not when you risk your own health or that of others. I know in my first trimester of pregnancy, I felt so terrible and needed help. I had people telling me to suck it up and get on with life. No. Just no. I rested because that is what my body needed and that is what the baby needed for me to do. That is how God created us and we have to listen. That ad would bother me too. Especially during flu season here I did not want to take John out because I knew there would be infected people at the stores anyway! It's just inconsiderate, I think.
Thank you for such a helpful post and a good reminder.
With love, Kelsey
I you are wise to plan for days off. With the shift work then you will find different days that can be a rest. They will be needed!
I think you were really wise to keep John out of places with lots of flu exposure. It sounded very serious there and a young child just doesnt need this. I would have been very cautious too. Well done! With love Annabel.xxx
Great post! A doctor at our church told me once if you feel like your getting sick? Go to bed. He told me the immune system works better when your flat on your back. That is why in the olden days doctors prescribed bed rest. Now, they give you Meds and tell you keep going. We all need permission to rest when we are ill and should not feel guilty about it.ReplyDelete
Today at church a very nice man kept coughing right behind me. I wish he had read your article. :)ReplyDelete
A rest day is such good advice. I believe in a slower pace, regular meals at home, and family walks. Truthfully, with our slower pace, our family rarely gets sick. In our area, restaurant foods are sodium laden and unhealthy, so home cooked meals are essential.