You can't buy...

You have heard me talking about Laines Letters so many times. Of all the things I learned reading them the biggest is this.... you cannot buy most of the things that are really important. No amount of money will buy you the list of things I am about to talk about. Your own work, your own hands and your own attitude are just more valuable than you can know.

You cannot buy atmosphere for your home. There is no candle you can burn that makes a happy nurturing and safe atmosphere. No interior designer and no amount of money can buy safe and cosy. Nope that stuff just isn't for sale. But you can create it, increase it, maintain it and nurture it through all the loving little things you do.

You can't pay someone to look after your child as you would. No amount of money ensures even the basics are going on when you are not looking. A Mothers watchful eye cannot be easily replaced. Unfortunately no amount of money spent  protects a child in a strangers care. This is a hard one. There are times we may have no choice and there is an age where you have no choice. But none the less money does not buy trustworthiness.  I heard a judge say that pedophiles are smart. They always place themselves where children are, where they are most trusted and where they have access. They are not stupid. Parents are! I have never forgotten that. 

You can't buy relationships. No amount of gifts and stuff replaces spending time with someone, loving them, knowing their thoughts and feelings. 

You can't buy style. We all can visualise vast amounts of money spent by people only to look tacky and worse.... you just can't buy style.

You can't buy empathy, sympathy.... I'm not sure it can even be taught to some but a good example and good discipline can teach it and nurture it in a child.

You can't buy class.  Like the funny scene in Eliza Doolittle when she is at the races... she speaks BEAUTIFULLY but the content is so terrible it's hilarious. 

You can't buy practicality. No amount of money is enough if it all slips through your fingers. Good sense and wisdom just can't be bought either!

You can't buy grace. Restraint. Humour. Kindness. Determination. Resolve. Resilience.

In the end you can be hire help for certain things and we can learn and increase our skills and understanding over time. But really the overall atmosphere of our homes, the general state of things comes down to us. The wonderful part of this is that a beautiful atmosphere can be created without much money. We can look nice and act in a gracious way with little cash. Clean brushed hair, clean clothes, good manners, considerate nature... all make a person who is respected, not large amounts of cash spent on this seasons wardrobe. 

Really you can't force anyone to learn anything. A person has to have a teachable heart. We have to have teachable hearts and want to continually learn and do better. Like when Helen Keller's brain suddenly "got" the relationship between the squiggles on her hand and the item she was touching and she realised it was language, had meaning, mean't communication! That huge !!! moment when we understand a new concept and things are not what we thought or presumed! That mind bending moment when you realise there is another way you had never thought of! Well, you can't buy that you have to be teachable and willing to accept new ideas and possibilities!

You cannot buy peace or contentment. A million dollars on relaxing therapies still might not relax you and no amount of money buys contentment. As far as I can see these are things that grow as kind of a fruit of how we live our lives. No amount of stuff fixes a hole in your heart.

You can't buy love. Especially with kids. They can stop a fraud a mile away. Many of us will have someone in our hearts who we know loved us. I am betting when you think of it, it's not the things they bought you, it's the time they spend with you and the way they made you feel.

What it all means to me is so much comes down to us. I know not everything but so much... Rather than feeling overwhelmed I think lets feel important. Our work is not for nothing, it is irreplaceable. Our attitude sets a tone and affects everyone around us influencing people enormously and changing generations to come. With little kids we are laying down a foundation and you only get one chance to do it. It is soon gone and they have grown into another stage. 

There are so many ways your daily work is truly worth more than rubies.